Don't get used to it...

“Don’t get used to it”… my mom’s words of advice before I went to the prison again. I don’t think she to worry about that. I don’t think its something you can ever get used to. It may get easier, but being in a prison isn’t something that will ever be 100% comfortable for me. However, every time I have gone, I have left so incredibly blessed. Last week I went again to San Sebastian prison. This time there was no group, just Carlos and I. There was no translation needed, so it was me that had to speak. I spoke about Ruth and how she chose to remain joyful and positive despite her circumstances. I was able to share about how I was recently tested in this area. I talked to the inmates about how almost two months ago my birth dad passed away. It was the first time I have ever experienced a loss, and it would have been easy to choose bitterness like Naomi. But because my hope is in the Lord, I was able to look to Ruth’s example and choose to stay positive and trust in the Lord and His timing.  After I spoke we had some time to talk to the inmates. One of them approached me and started asking me questions super specific questions about how I dealt with my fathers passing. Finally he started to share with me what he has been going through. Just 4 days before his own father had passed away, and was really struggling with being able to forgive him for things he had done. This is a topic that is very close to my heart because I too had to learn how to forgive my father.

Right now I am in the process of looking for a job in the US (not such an easy task). This is the first time in my life where I don’t have a plan for what’s next. But if God has been teaching me anything these past couple of months is to trust in His perfect timing.  Like Ruth I can be joyful in a time of sorrow, because the Lord uses our testimonies to help others. I know God took my father for a reason at that time and I praise God that I was able to share with this man how I overcame my struggles with Gods power. I can be thankful for my trials because I know in the end it will draw me closer to the Lord and teach me how to persevere.

I know that this man is struggling right now. He is seeking the Lord, but darkness surrounds him. He doesn’t have much hope or strength right now. I ask that you would be praying for Jobe right now. He needs prayer in so many ways but here are ways you can be praying for him:

            Protection in the prison

            That the Lord would raise leaders in the prison to reach out to him

            That he would choose joy in a time of bitterness

            That he can see the Lord’s light in spite of being surrounded by darkness

            That he can come to accept the Lord’s forgiveness in his life and in turn forgive his father

I also want to encourage you to share your testimonies of the Lord’s work in your life. It is through these testimonies that we can connect with others and share God’s love.

No worries... these were taken in a museum that used to be a prison

The Little Things

I love the little things that I get to do to help people here. I have learned, and done a lot of things I didn’t expect I would. My time hear has been such a huge blessing and I love what I get to do. For example, yesterday I invited 3 little girls over to my house to make and decorate cupcakes. These girls have experienced a lot of tough things in their life so I wanted to give them a little joy. They had never made or even eaten cupcakes before. Another part of my ministry that I really love is helping the woman I live with. She has severe diabetes, so I have been teaching her healthy ways to eat. I love cooking for her because she thinks everything I make is gourmet quality (in reality I make simple things like chili). It’s the little things like these that make m ministry so rewarding. They are little things that don’t take much time or energy, but I believe it’s the little things that make a lasting impact. It makes me think of all the little things Jesus did, that change lives and made huge impacts. In Matthew 10:40-42, Jesus says,

 “Whoever receives you receives me, and whoever receives me receives him who sent me. The one who receives a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet's reward, and the one who receives a righteous person because he is a righteous person will receive a righteous person's reward. And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward.”

This has never been more real to me than now. With the passing of a loved one, its all the little things that I remember about him. It’s the little things that I miss. Yes our God is mighty and all-powerful, but he is also a God of little things. And I am so thankful for that. I alone am not capable of doing huge things, but I believe that with Gods strength I can do a lot of little things. In reality my time here in Costa Rica has been short, but it’s the little things that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I pray that God will use the little things I do, that maybe I don’t even notice, will stay when I go back to the US.  I hope that each of you will find some little way to show Gods love this coming week, whether its sending a “just thinking of you” card to a friend, or buying a co-worker some coffee. God can use that small act of love to make a lasting impact.

Prayer Requests

So since I continue to be awful at blogging, I thought I would take this opportunity to do something a little different. I normally talk about the goings on around here, but I thought I would do a post about prayer requests. I know it is important to share what God is doing in my life, but I also believe that you all can join in on that through prayer. The best way for you all to get involved in what God is doing here in Costa Rica is not to read stories, but to join in on the conversation through prayer. I believe God still has amazing things in store for the church in Calle Blancos, and I believe it will be accomplished because of prayers being lifted up. So here are some things I have been praying for the community:

  o   For the youth who come to church occasionally to become more involved through small groups.

  o   For the Friday night evangelism group to shine light in the community, and to bring people to Christ.

  o   For the youth to stay motivated with their schoolwork.

  o   For the youth leadership team to grow in their leadership skills.

  o   For the Sunday school lessons I teach to be helpful, motivating, and also challenging to the youth.

  o   For Saturday night youth group to reach not only the older youth, but also the younger youth.

  o   For new ideas to keep the youth interested and to be inviting for new youth. 

  o   For me to have the right questions when spending one on one time with the youth.

  o   For discernment about when to move back to the U.S.

  o   For a job whenever I do move back to the States.

  o   For God to continue to teach me and strengthen me during my time here.

Thank you so much for joining me in ministry here in Costa Rica. I hope that you can find time to pray for a few of these requests. I know that when we join our prayers, God will surely answer. I expect big things to happen here, and I will keep you updated on answered prayers!

Finding strength in the Psalms

Wow I have not blogged in a long time, and I am so sorry for not keeping everyone updated. Things have been very normal around here. Still teaching English classes, sunday school, helping the youth leaders, evangelism, etc. However, I have noticed some new things... my relationships with the people here are growing everyday, I have a lot less free time, and my walk with God has grown so much stronger than when I first got here. Before I came I expected for my relationship with the Lord to strengthen, and He has proven faithful. When your family and friends are thousands of miles away, you find strength in other ways. When you try to do it on your own, you are only left feeling lonely and week. In the past few months, I have learned that relying on the Lord's strength brings peace, and comfort. This past month, I have clung to the Psalms as a way to strengthen my prayer life. I absolutely love how honest and sincere David is with God. He wasn't afraid to express his frustration, fear and loneliness. He told God when he felt distant and away from his presence. He also gave praise in every circumstance. By David's example I have cried out to the Lord with my whole heart. I feel like we often "sugar coat" our prayers and don't tell the Lord how we really feel. I have done that NUMEROUS times. When we are honest with God, it only hurts us more and distances us from Him. He tells us that he knows our every thought, so why aren't we sincere with Him in our conversations?  I have found that I feel more at peace when I talk with God in every worry, frustration, joy, need, thanks. We often go to our friends and family first for comfort, but when we cling to the lord our comfort is much more deep. Sorry this post is kind of scattered. I just wanted to share what the Lord has been teaching me in the last month. I know He is not done with me here, and I am excited to see how he continues to stretch and challenge me. It is through stretching the we become stronger; however, stretching also often brings soreness. But  because of our hope in the Lord, we can press on knowing it is for our good. I pray that you also find yourselves being stretched in your faith. I love sharing my journey with you all, but I would love even more to hear your journey. When we share our stories, it only encourages us to continue running the race with perseverance. 

Locked up abroad

I’m so glad God sometimes asks us to do things that we never thought we would or that we don’t want to do. I knew when I partnered with Carlos and Karla here in Costa Rica that there would be a possibility that I would do something with prison ministry. They not only are the pastors of the church I work in, but they also have a thriving prison ministry called Voz de Libertad. That opportunity came last week when we had a team here from Texas. I saw the schedule about a month in advanced and just tried not to think about the fact that the prison was one of their first activities. The night before as I was laying in bed I started to pray that if I had to go to the prison that the Lord would give me the strength and peace to go. All I could think about was those episodes of locked up abroad I’ve seen.  We started off the day doing construction work in the church and I just out it out of mind hoping that when 6:00 rolled around that night, I would be home resting and not getting checked by a guard. I started talking to Carlos and he said while laughing that I had to go to the prison. I then asked him if he was going to come back to the church to pick me up or if he was meeting the team there. He said I could ride with the team. So I walked over to ask their team leader if they had space, all while hoping that their bus would be completely full (leaving no way for me to get to the prison). But of course they had plenty of room for me in the bus.

So I got to the prison, the guard patted me down and I headed inside. There are a few big differences here in Costa Rica than what you see portrayed in movies. First when they let you through the gate, there are no 2-man cells lining the walls. You walk in and the inmates are right there in the hallway. Also the inmates here don’t wear uniforms so half the men there don’t have shirts on or their pants are almost to their knees. As I walked in I stared straight at the floor and blocked out the noise. Then something amazing happened. I walked into the church inside the prison and everything looked different. I was the translator for our group so I introduced everybody and then we started with the program. Two men from the Texas group shared their testimonies and combined lasted less than 10 minutes so there was a lot of time left in the program. I asked them what else they had planned and they said nothing. So I told God, “well I guess its up to me”. So I started talking and I told the inmates honestly that I hadn’t prepared anything, and that it was up to God to give me a word to say. And like God, he gave me almost 15 minutes of things to say. Then we started passing out cookies and hygiene kits. I started talking with the church leader and then it was time to go. So we headed out of the church and then it hit me. I had forgotten I was in a prison. The whole time I translated and spoke, God had given me His eyes for the men there. I left the prison knowing without a doubt that the Holy Spirit is living and active in San Sebastian prison. As I was riding back with Carlos I was telling him about my experience and until he asked me “you don’t even feel like you’re in a room filled with murderers do you?” that I realized it never once crossed my mind to wonder what they had done to be there. In spite of all my fears and worries going into the prison, the Lord answered my prayers and gave me complete peace and I would go as far as saying comfort in the prison. He changed my fear into joy and I will forever remember what God showed me that day. I couldn’t help but be reminded in Philippians 4 where it talks about a “peace that transcends all understanding”. And that is the only way I can explain what I felt. By no means should a 23-year-old American girl feel at peace in the middle of a Costa Rican prison surrounded by inmates, but like Philippians says the Lord guarded my heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

As I reflect on this experience I can’t wait till the Lord asks me to do something I’m not comfortable with because I know that the blessings highly out way any worries I may have before. Hopefully I will be able to go back to the prison and continue to grow and learn what it means to love my brothers in Christ!

Ups and Downs

So I have almost been here in Costa Rica for 5 months now, which is so weird to think about. Being here definitely has its ups and downs, but this past month has been more up and down than usual. Things here are very normal now. I have a routine I’m used to, I know how to take the bus really well, I know what food I’m going to get everyday for breakfast lunch and dinner. Things are no longer new and exciting. I’ve left the “honeymoon” stage if you will. This is good in that I feel like I have really settled here. However, because everything has lost its newness now, it makes me miss things back home more. I will say this past month has been the toughest when it comes to homesickness.

Like I said though, this month has also had a lot of ups. We had the annual youth camp this year, and in many ways it was like all the other youth camps I have been a part of here. We had some great messages, games, and free time. My favorite part of course was the free time because I had the chance to just sit and talk to several of the youth that I didn’t know very well. It was the first time that I didn’t have to translate the camp, so I was able to sit and listen to the other youth leaders share their lessons and in turn was richly blessed. It was also the first time that when the time come to go back to the church to be greeted by all the parents and have the closing ceremony that I didn’t get choked up in tears. I didn’t have to say sad “goodbyes” and “see you next years” and that was an amazing feeling. I am able to continue building relationships with the youth here and my ministry doesn’t just end after a week. The difference is amazing being able to see how the youth continue to grow and change after the camp when they return back to school and reality. I get to be there when they struggle with daily things, when they celebrate their birthdays, and when they need help with their English homework. The blessing is so much great when I am able to invest this whole year and not just a week. This is all I have to think about when I am in those low times and it puts everything in perspective again and makes it all worth it. Just today I was walking to my house and saw a family from the church that has 4 little girls. A missionary from the Mormon Church was talking to them. I stopped to talk to them, and one of the little girls would not stop hugging me while we were chatting. It was such a beautiful image of why I am here. The other missionary was trying to share her religion with the family in a short 5-minute conversation, but because I see these girls every week at church I am able to have a true relationship with them.

My adventure here has not been easy, especially being away from my family. However, little by little God is strengthening my relationships here. I have learned a lot about what it means to “leave your father and mother” to serve the Lord and I am continuing to learn everyday what it means to fully rely on Him in everything. I have always known how important my church family is, and here it is growing even bigger.

Birds of the air

I have been thinking about Matthew 6:26 a lot lately. “Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap, nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not worth much more than they?” 

When I started this journey in October of 2010, and I was looking at the budget and how much I needed to raise in support I was nervous, worried, anxious, all the emotions that display lack of trust in the Lord. I thought Lord how in the world am I going to raise these funds… Well he answered by reminding me that all the funds in the world are His and we are just stewards of it. So after the initial shock of the end number, God gave me an amazing peace about everything. Once I gave control of the budget to God, I started seeing the donations rolling in. Also, He blessed me with two great jobs while I was in college, so I was able to put money into the ministry as well. It made working while studying so much easier when I new that my work at the present time was going to help support my future work here in Costa Rica. Now that I am well into my time here in Costa Rica and I continue to see funds come in I laugh at how I was first nervous about having enough money to come. I think God was laughing at me when I was worrying about asking people for money because he had everything in control even before the very first thought of coming to Costa Rica. In this moment I am so happy to report that I am at 100% + extra funding right now. I have enough in my account to support myself and the ministry costs here for the rest of my time here. I have been so humbled by the support I have received; not only financially, but also spiritually. God has shown me what it means to be blessed by giving, both on the giving and receiving end. I know what it feels like to be so overwhelmed by seeing donations come in to support something you care so much about. Thank you so much for your gifts and prayers. Even though I am 100% financially funded, I will NEVER be without need of your thoughts and prayers. So I am asking that you continue this journey with me by praying for me, and the Calles Blancos community. 

On another note, I realized that I haven't blogged in over a month. YIKES! So many things have happened since I last blogged. I went home for 2 beautiful weddings, I came back to Costa Rica, then my sister came to visit for 2 weeks. Things will continue to be crazy busy in July. We have a youth camp next week, vacation bible school, a missionary team coming to do some work on the church, and of course THE OLYMPICS :). So there will be plenty to blog about next month!